Pip, pokes, and Godsmack oh my !
by darthjag
Summary: Seras has dissapeared ! will Pip go crazy has Alucard got anything to do with it and where the hell are the rest of the characters.
1. Default Chapter

He walked slowly through the streets madness in his eyes as he store at his cattle , his prey they were all his for the taking it was odd how no one noticed a stranger with near white skin and red eyes but of course humans were stupid it was simply a fact .

He started moving faster as the hunger got to him he wanted , no needed to feed now he grabbed the nearest women and dragged her into the back alley the girl had blonde hair and was wrapped up very well and had….. Red eyes.

"Umm sorry didn't no you were a….oh man" a hole suddenly appeared through his chest and in that hole was the girls arm .

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God she would have to thank her master for teaching her that , teaching her what you might ask well teaching her the super dee duper poke through a vampires chest attack after all it was Alucards most powerful attack (when he is on the highest restraint level of course) she brushed the dust off her arm and continued to the Woolworth's hoping that they had what her master wanted .

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"Where is Seras" ? those were the words that captain Pip asked looking at Walter who near enough always knew where everyone was .

"I believe miss Seras went out on a errand by sir Alucard something about bringing back something" ? ended Walter .

Oh my god what kind of depraved evil thing did Alcuard want the girl he had a crush on to bring back perhaps the still beating heart of one of his enemies , he wouldn't let her be twisted into what Alcuard is he ran as fast as he could down to Alucards basement room and with a mighty boot kicked it open .

And for two seconds the French mercenary wished he hadn't first of all the walls were bleeding ! yes bleeding , blood was sliding down them and just wouldn't stop and secondly a quiet little voice in the back of his mind was telling him to kill himself .

"Master's been watching The Amityville Horror again" came a voice next to his ear "just ignore the voice it goes away after a few minutes" this new voice continued .

Pip spun to see who had been talking to him it was …..Seras it was rather obvious ,but in his state of heightened worry his brain had temporarily shut off .

"Why are you in my room" ? came Alucards voice from the darkness .

"To make sure Seras doesn't give you the evil……" started pip who watched as Seras threw a cd at her master who caught it easily " …… cd" ?

"What's so evil about Godsmack" came the voice of Alucard again a Cheshire cat grin on his face .

Red flushed with embarrassment Pip turned and walked out .

(Awwww poor pip please read and review)


	2. chapter 2

( I didn't really want to do another one but since the fans like I may as well this a sort of what the hell happened afterwards also the bleeding wall thing was a joke I stole out of the Amityville horror where the house makes it's walls bleed)

Pip sat their drowning his sorrows he felt a right fool and his team (the wild geese) were laughing at him also he had wondered where miss Integra had been all day and when he had asked Walter he was ignored .

And so pip sat there downing a bottle of vodka that had been conveniently hidden in the back of the fridge suddenly there was a click "who's there" he slurred one eye closed the other twitching rather violently.

There was another quiet click as someone entered the kitchen it was…… miss Integra but wait it couldn't be her miss Integra would never wear a black t-shirt with the arms ripped and the words **Mettalica forever** written on it with a short black mini-skirt and he hair in pony tail , he must have been hitting the booze to hard .

He store at the bottle for a second before putting it down and shaking his head to make sure that what he was seeing was real and not some drunken hallucination unfortunately while shaking his head pip's braid got caught in one of the mixers whisks. (of course pip didn't notice this as he was blind stinking drunk )

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Integra walked into the kitchen and put one of the many bangles she was wearing at her concert on the kitchen side , she loved the concert it was brilliant , all the noise and the people and…. She sighed not noticing where she put the bangles , she turned and quietly crept out of the pitch black kitchen. (yes pip didn't put the lights on)

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A noise that sounded somewhat like a click filled the air before something buzzed loudly and dragged pip backwards "DEAR GOD HELP ME IT'S GOT ME " screamed pip flailing his arms wildly around as he was dragged off the back of his chair and hit the floor rather hard .

The lights turned on as various members of the hellsing organization arrived or to be more exact Alucard Seras and Walter .

Walter was wearing a simple striped pyjama set whereas Seras was wearing short's and a tank top while Alucard was wearing blood red silk pyjamas and had a…….. teddy bear !.

"What the hell is going on in here" growled Alucard annoyed his sleep patterns were already buggered up he didn't need this blonde fool causing problems .

"It got me it got me" mewled pip his eyes half closed .

Walter leaned forward before saying "my god man you're drunk" .

"Nah ya think" said pip with as much coherent sarcasm and thought that he could muster through his alcohol filled brain .

"Come on let's get you to bed" said Walter as he lifted the French mercenary up and dragged him down the corridor the mixer trailing behind him .

"I LOVE YOU SERAS" screamed pip drunkenly before he and Walter turned a corner and his screams died down the only noise was the screech of the mixer as it was pulled along .

Seras looked at Alucard and Alucard looked at Seras before both of them looked at the half empty bottle of vodka .

And then in the darkness Alucards voice ran out and lo and behold he said "Can someone say drinking game" .

(and so I finish another quick ending hope yall liked it)


End file.
